Deborah Tannen

Deborah Tannen's offical website.

Watch this video from you Tube.


"Can't We Talk?" (condensed from: You Just Don't Understand)


Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence. To survive in the world, we have to act in concert with others, but to survive as ourselves, rather than simply as cogs in a wheel, we have to act alone.
Deborah Tannen

Each person's life is lived as a series of conversations.
Deborah Tannen

Each underestimates her own power and overestimates the other's.
Deborah Tannen

For most women, the language of conversation is primarily a language of rapport: a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships.
Deborah Tannen

Relationships are made of talk - and talk is for girls and women.
Deborah Tannen

The biggest mistake is believing there is one right way to listen, to talk, to have a conversation - or a relationship.
Deborah Tannen

We all know we are unique individuals, but we tend to see others as representatives of groups.
Deborah Tannen

We tend to look through language and not realize how much power language has.
Deborah Tannen